What to Discuss With Your Partner Before Getting Married

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Marriage is a huge step and it deserves the utmost care. Never enter into a marriage without first making sure that you know everything you need to know about one another. A marriage can only work when you are both on the same page. 

This can only happen when the lines of communication are wide open. 

Beliefs and Values

People might say that opposites attract but even if that’s true, opposites don’t often make for the happiest of marriages. Complementing strengths and weaknesses might be a good thing. Diverse interests can add spice to the relationship. However, a marriage is far more successful when the beliefs and values are shared

You may think that your love can conquer all differences, but that ideal isn’t very helpful when reality hits and one of you wants to raise your children to be good, prayer-saying little Christians while the other is a doggedly-determined atheist. The more you can be aligned on religious beliefs, educational values, monetary goals, sexuality, and child-rearing, the better. At the very least, be certain that your partner will respect and support you in your differences. 

What Kind of Wedding You Want

Some relationships are so fraught with contention that they don’t even survive the wedding planning. This is especially true if you both have very different ideas of what you want your wedding to look like. You should both talk and decide what’s most important to you. How big should it be? How much are you willing to spend? 

What type of venue do you want? What parts of the wedding can you compromise on, and what are the absolute requirements? One person’s desires should never trump the other’s. Instead, work together so that you can plan a wedding that you both feel good about


For most people, family is everything. As you combine to form a new family, you will want to maintain some level of connection and ties to your immediate family members. Remember, you aren’t just marrying an individual–you are marrying into a family. Get to know your partner’s family and decide now to simply appreciate them for their good qualities. You should also discuss how big of a role you want your immediate family to play in your new life together. You may need to set some healthy boundaries together.

The hope is that your marriage will be forever. And if you get forever together, there’s no reason to rush it. Have the difficult conversations so that you can be sure that you are compatible. There shouldn’t be any big surprises in marriage–just a lifetime of growing, loving, and sharing together. 

Did you enjoy reading this article? Here’s more to read. Areas Where You Shouldn’t Go Cheap at Your Wedding

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